Transcript: From Working Out at Night to Fitness Instructor | Rhonda's 21-Day Habit Secret (Part 3)
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Ashley introduces the final episode of the three-part series with Rhonda, recapping the previous two episodes and previewing today's topics: plateaus, starting from zero, the 21-day habit rule, and mindset shifts around exercise.
What's up, you guys? Famous Ashley Grant here, and welcome to More Movement, Please. We've made it to the final episode of my three -part series with the one and only, the fabulous, the myth, the legend, Rhonda Goode. She's my fitness instructor, and even though she kind of gagged at me saying this, she's my inspiration. If you haven't listened to the previous episodes, I highly recommend going back to the start and listening to all of them. I'll put the links to the other two episodes in the show notes, but... we're going to make this episode work as a standalone too.
So far in this series, we have talked about how Rhonda transformed her own life by losing 120 pounds and breaking her family's generational health patterns. We dove deep into watching her mother's health decline and how that shaped everything Rhonda has done for the last 15 years. And today, well, today we're getting into the practical stuff. We're talking about what to do when you hit a plateau, how to actually start if you're a complete beginner. the 21 -day habit rule, and Rhonda's three non -negotiable do's and three don'ts for anyone who's stepping back into a gym. Or maybe stepping into a gym for the first time. We're also going to tackle the big mindset shift. How do you stop seeing exercise as punishment and start seeing it as peace? Oh, and Rhonda's going to tell you straight up, if you're not having fun, you're in the wrong place. Period.
This is it, you guys. The final episode, so let's finish strong. Let's get into it. Speaking of gaining, you had posted that your body gets used to everything you do when you work out. And at some point, you're going to need to change it up. So when people hit a plateau, what should they do about it? Well, unfortunately, sometimes like the best thing that they could do is work out at a different time. And when you're retired and you only come in the morning, you're not going to come at night. No. So it's hard for some people because you really should switch.
Rhonda explains that plateaus often require changing workout timing, switching to outdoor activities like hiking, or shifting eating patterns — and acknowledges how hard it is for people, especially retirees, to break their routines.
your work I mean I try to switch up workouts as much as possible yeah I mean try but at the same time there's only so many things you can do yeah so you know I try to keep things varied as much as we can but a lot of it is that working out at a different time of day or choosing not to go to the gym and taking the hike instead or You know, doing something difficult outside that you would never do otherwise, but you're going to have the energy to do it. So like for here, people hiking the pinnacles, there's an easy pinnacle hike and there's a hard pinnacle hike, you know, but doing things like that instead of going to the gym every once in a while. I know, but it's really about varying your eating schedule and when you're working out sometimes.
It's hard for people because people get in routines. So it's really it's really hard for people to switch up, especially people that work and have many people retired. I think retired people are more stuck in their routines and the people that work, honestly, because it's like, no, every morning at 745, I have coffee, you know, and it's like, OK, so and I'm like that. I don't like my routine messed with at all. I mean, I don't. And you know, I do not. I have my specific morning routine. I have a specific afternoon and evening routine. I don't like my routine messed with. And when I wasn't as old as I am now, you know, occasionally I would take the extra walk just so around the park and, you know, but just breaking it up a little bit sometimes.
And even... You know, you don't always have to carry big weights. I mean, I used to tell people all the time when they were trying to just start in fitness and, well, I don't have time to go to the gym, whatever. It's like, well, do you walk? Well, I just started walking. Okay, well, start walking and then add some wrist weights to your walk. You know, I don't tell people to add ankle weights very often because ankles and knees, like, I mean, it's one thing if you're 19, but as you get older, they don't really like that weight thing to me added to them. But it is hard for people to change up routines. It is. And sometimes it's just a matter of changing what you're eating. And like if you're carb heavy, always at lunch and switching it to dinner, which sounds crazy. But your body doesn't know if you do things like that. Like sometimes I eat a salad at night. It's like, oh, you know. But that's
it. And you will hear people, too. And I did find it to be true. I don't do it anymore because I just don't enjoy it. But you will hear people say that I've been working out forever. And like there are some people that really go into that, you know, 80 percent clean diet thing and 20 percent. It's not me. But they would have like their cheat meal on the weekend and they would go eat garbage and notice that they would take weight off from doing it. which sounds crazy, but it is true. I mean, any kind of thing you do that switches up what your body is used to, whether that's food or working out, a lot of times, not always, you'll notice that you'll drop weight. It's weird. But you also have to know that you're going to fluctuate. Everybody does. Got to make your body confused. Yeah. So you kind of already touched on this, but if someone was starting from zero and they're overweight, they have health issues, they're intimidated,
Rhonda describes what step one looks like for a complete beginner — going to a regular gym rather than a muscle gym, where most people are average and welcoming — and emphasizes that doing anything is better than sitting on the couch.
whatever, what would you say step one is? I think step one for most people is still to go to the gym, which sounds really intimidating. But unless you're going in like, I mean, they exist. We have one here in town. Unless you're going to like the muscle gyms. Most gyms are filled with pretty average looking folks. There's not, you know, I mean, it doesn't mean you're not going to be intimidated, but for the most part, when you walk in a gym, people around you are going to introduce themselves. Hi, nice to meet you.
What's your name? And they're going to tell you the equipment you need for the class if I'm not there yet. And they're going to suggest to you that, you know, just do what you can. That's what they'll always say to you. That's what I'll say to you. Just do what you can. But whatever you do when you start is better than sitting on the couch at home. Or they'll tell you you need a different class. Yeah. Like what happened to me? Yeah. Yeah. But it's hard to start. But you have to be determined that you're going to do it for you. Because it's never for anyone but you. And when it is, you don't, it doesn't work. That's right. I know we've been taking a little bit of time and I'm trying to respect your time. So I might have to bring you back on for more. But in 2018, you said 21 days is a habit. Try working out for 21 days in a row and see if you stop. Is that still your recommendation for people? Oh, yeah. Because that's just science.
Rhonda reaffirms her 2018 recommendation that working out for 21 consecutive days turns it into a habit, calling it simply science.
I mean, there's books all about that, right? That if you do anything for 21 days. Books? You don't read books. Yeah, I know. I don't. But yeah, if you do anything for 21 days, that makes it a habit. So, yeah. Okay. Yeah. In January 2020, you shared your comprehensive do's and don'ts list. You shared you do have to show up even when you don't feel like it. You don't have to buy specific clothes for the gym. If you could give listeners just three non -negotiable do's and three don'ts, what would they be? Oh, do go to the gym and close your comfortable in.
Comfortable to sweat in. Comfortable to move in. Don't worry about what you look like. Nobody's there to look cute. People are there to work. And don't worry about what you look like in the mirror if you're in a class. No one's looking at you but you. Everyone else is looking at me. So you're not the focus. You may think you're the focus, especially if you're new, but you're really not. Really not. So do take water to the gym. And be prepared to sweat. I mean, if you have not... been moving and some people naturally just don't sweat. I think those are the weirdest people ever. And I kind of am envious of them actually, but they, I know I have like two of them. I'm like, y 'all, I mean, I'm just drenched, but be prepared to sweat and have water because you don't want to get dehydrated and get lightheaded while you're working out. And it does happen, especially people starting, you've never done
Rhonda walks through her non-negotiable do's — wear comfortable clothes, bring water, focus on small changes — and don'ts — don't compare yourself to others or to your younger self, and don't listen to people who undermine your time at the gym.
it. So, and do focus on The small things that you can change first, like especially with diet, the little things. So everyone has their really bad habits or a bad habit. So whether that's eating. I had someone once that told me that they had nachos every night in their toaster oven. And because we were having a discussion about the fact that they were pre -diabetic and in their 30s. And they were coming to the gym, but they weren't seeing a lot of results. And I said, well, what's your what's your thing?
Everybody has their thing, whether it's a bowl of ice cream at night, like everybody has their thing. And they said, oh, well, I have nachos every night. And I said, well, perhaps you could consider maybe nachos three times a week. Drop it back. Pick days, you know, I'm willing to do that. Well, then you're probably not going to see any changes. I mean, you've got to make. You've got to make some small steps. That's probably why I'm so anti going no sugar, no carbs. It has to be things that are livable. And for most people, that's not livable. It's just not. So just focus on the small things that you can do.
And then I guess the other do would be always measure when you start. Always measure. Yeah. And stay away from the scale. Because. The scale will really upset you. It'll make you cry. Yeah, it will. And as you gain muscle, you do indeed gain pounds when you gain muscle. And your body just fluctuates and changes. So, you know. So, yeah. Wear comfortable things. Show up and focus on the small things you can do. Don't compare yourself to other people. Don't compare yourself to you 20 years ago. Because for most people, that's not going to happen. And don't listen to all the people in your life who tell you that you're not worth it or that the time you're spending is not worth it. Or if they're suddenly jealous of the time you're away from them, that it's not worth it because you are the only one that you know you can depend on. And if everyone else around you is gone, what does your future look
like? Well, that was intense. Yeah. I think we're going to stop it there because I do have a lot more questions, but I hope you will consider coming back and chatting with me some more. I guess it depends on how I edit it. Because, yeah, I had some other stuff, but... You can add a couple more. I can? Okay. Alrighty. Well, let's talk about the people who disappear and people who have fallen off the wagon hard and you'll ask them, you know, when will I see you again?
Rhonda reflects on clients who repeatedly fall off and return, noting that those who start and stop tend to stop permanently, and shares her frustration when people's potential goes unrealized — including a story about a mother and overweight child who came to one class and never returned.
And what do you say to someone who keeps starting and stopping? How can you get them to break the cycle or how should they go about breaking the cycle? It is hard for people to, that's why I'm so adamant about don't stop because any excuse you can find to stop. I mean, a day or a week's vacation is different. But you know my people check in. If they're going to be gone for a week, they tell me. Because they know I'm going to message and be like, hello. But people that just start and stop, they tend to always be the ones that stop permanently. And there's just nothing you can do. And again, if you don't want to do it for yourself, then no one else can make you.
Well, you're pretty scary. I mean, so, you know, and there are some that I just I've lost people over there. I mean, a lot of people just come and go. I mean, that's just part of it. But I've definitely lost people that have gotten mad at me. I mean, I can name them on one hand. I mean, I know who they are and they know who they are. Yeah. But but that it's always, you know, those people that. Well, they come to me. It's not like I go to them and say, hey, you look just like you did three months ago. I mean, it's not like I do that. They're like, gosh, can you, I'm just not seeing, you know. And then when we start having the discussions about the nachos or that you're going home and drinking a bottle of wine every night. Yeah. I mean, you can't.
And then that whole thing about you can't outwork a bad diet. I mean, that's the, you know, that's the phrase. I'm like, I mean. Depends on how bad your diet is. I mean, that's why I believe in living the way I do and, you know, eating some of what I like. It just depends on how bad your diet is. But it's really hard for people that start and stop. I mean, I will occasionally try, but there are times when I just am like, there's nothing I can do. I mean, you know, you give up. I can only imagine. And it's got to be rough because, you know, you'd see what could be done. And then if they're not making the change.
Well, it's always rough for me when I see people's potential. But then again, I'm like, do you not have anyone in your life? I mean, my mother was such a driving force for me to not be that. And I think when people either don't have that because they haven't experienced it yet, because if you're younger and you're in your 20s, your 30s and your mom's 50s, then no, it's not bad yet. Yeah. I mean, but it's coming, but it's coming, you know, so. I think that when people don't have something like that to drive them and, and they're just not naturally want to be physical, that it's hard for people, a lot of people to just stick with it. But the other thing is, and I used to preach this all the time too, and I've made Facebook posts about this years ago, but you know, it was like, well, I have kids and they all play sports and you know, like, okay, well your kids are probably not going to be the
next Michael Jordan. And any little trophies they get for all these sports they're playing aren't going to mean deadly to them when you're 70 and can't move. And so if your kids' activities are taking up all of your time when you have work and house and everything else to do, then you really should think about what you're handing your kids' future. Because your kids are the ones that have to deal with your future if you have kids. And would they rather have a healthy parent? Or a parent that dragged them to the ball field six nights a week and gave them trophies that meant nothing. That's all I'm saying. I know that I used to take my husband to he was in soccer. And because I didn't want to just stand there on the sidelines, I walked the field because at least I was still moving. Yeah. So maybe they should at least do that. Yeah. Yeah.
Well, one of the things that you. posted that kind of broke my heart is you shared a heartbreaking story about someone who approached you outside the gym. They wanted to talk to you about their health. They came to one class, but they never returned. Four years later, they received a terminal diagnosis. And you said the fact that they didn't do what they needed to do gnaws at you. That's heavy. How do you process stuff like that whenever you hear these stories from others? Yeah. And I still know who that person is. And they are dead. And, you know, and I tell people to like none of us know what our future holds as far as I mean, any of us can get a diagnosis today, tomorrow. And that's why I preach what I preach.
Rhonda revisits a post about someone who approached her about their health, came to one class, never returned, and later died from a terminal diagnosis — then expands on why she says 'sitting equals dying,' pointing to muscle atrophy, immobility, and an automated society that discourages movement.
Control what you can because none of us ever know. But when you know that. Obesity and bad choices makes you more prone to get diagnoses like cancer and that we've known this for years. Uh, it's always difficult when you see people that don't choose to make lifestyle choices and then get those diagnoses. And it's, I mean, to me, I would always be, what if, what if I have no idea if it would have mattered? I have no idea, but it, it's difficult. It's difficult for me too, to see people that come in. Cause I had somebody on probably four months ago now, probably. And she came in. definitely overweight and brought a child that was overweight with her to class. And the child didn't want to do anything. And so she is trying to get the child to move. And again, this is learned behavior.
So clearly this child sits when they're not, well, they sit at school and then. whether it's video games or whatever it is, this child is forcibly lazy and now looking at you and saying, I'm not going to do that. I mean, she fought with her the entire class and they never came back. They didn't come back because regardless of how the parent wanted to do, it was also really out of shape because she couldn't get her child to do it with her. She's not going to come back because A, it's not worth the fight. B, maybe she thinks that, you know. It's not worth my time being here either. And I can't not come without her. Yeah. Probably wasn't a child that was the age for childcare. I mean, it was older than that. Yeah. But those are the ones that really just get to me because it makes me angry.
Okay. Because it's like, you know, you have chosen your life. And then you have now passed it on to this child that you're responsible for their rearing, their activity and their food. Yeah. And of course, we see that everywhere. But and I knew they would never come back. And so they came to one class and that was it. Yeah. Well, I mean, that kind of leads into something else that you had posted. You said sitting equals dying. Don't roll the dice on your future. That's stark. So paint the picture of what rolling the dice looks like in 10, 20, 30 years to the people that just continue sitting on their butt. Well, I mean, I've witnessed it. I've watched it. And even when we're hurting, which for me now is daily, pretty much daily, something hurts. But the more I sit on it, whatever it is, the more it hurts. And that's what all of my seniors and people with back problems and replaced knees and all that they know. And that's why they're
at the gym, because sitting on it isn't going to help and not using it isn't going to help. So regardless of what ailments you have or don't have, your body was meant to move. Yeah. I mean, that's why society is where it's at now versus years ago when everybody had physical jobs. like getting up and changing the TV without a remote. I mean, everything has become automated and we look like it. I mean, it's seen in Wally. Yeah.
We are. Yeah. I mean, we, we are definitely a product of an automated society where anything that you ask someone to do, they're like put out. Yeah. Like I have to get up. What? What? So. Again, any of us could receive a terminal diagnosis at any time. I mean, we cannot ever predict what we're going to see or face. But that's why I'm adamant about control while you can, because we know that obesity and diabetes and all of those things lead to other ailments or immobility, period. Once you're immobile and you lose muscle mass and muscle tone, same thing for people that like break a hip in their 70s and end up in a hospital bed. And then they end up usually a lot of times in a nursing home because muscles atrophy. So I don't care what age you are, if you're sitting all the time and you're not using your body, then eventually you're not going to be able to use it. So you need to start using it. Yeah. Or you'll lose it. Yeah. And
Rhonda says plainly that if exercise feels like a chore and isn't fun, you're in the wrong place — and that the gym should feel like church, a place of peace and community with people who share the same goals.
that's kind of what started this podcast and why I named it More Movement, Please. It's like, you know, the fact that I was sitting all the time and recognizing that I needed to be moving more. Yeah. And, you know, I guess we'll finish with this, that you've said repeatedly that fitness isn't temporary. This isn't just a temporary thing or phase. It's a lifestyle. You said that it gives you peace and a clear mind in a chaotic world. So for someone who sees exercises as punishment or a chore, how can they shift to seeing it as peace and something that needs to happen? They're not in the right place, period. If exercise isn't fun, I mean, it's not always during the process.
It may not always be fun. But if my people have fun, they have fun. They have fun with each other. They have fun in class. If it's a chore and you're not having fun, you're in the wrong place. Find another place. Or find another activity. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Find another group. Find another. Yeah. Because it may not be fun all the time, but yeah, the gym should feel like the church, as you say. I mean, it should. I mean, it should feel like the place where... you come in and have the most peace because you're focusing on you and, and fun because of the people around you. I mean, you even have fun people you don't necessarily like because y 'all got the same goals. So, you know, but yeah, if you're not getting any enjoyment out of what you're doing, then you're doing the wrong thing or at the wrong place. Definitely. Okay. Yeah. That's, that's good advice. Yeah. So is there anything I didn't
Rhonda's closing advice is to just start moving, find someone to point you in the right direction, try a day pass at a gym without committing, and consider group fitness over going it alone.
ask you think I should? Or any parting words that you really want to make sure are said in this? I think for most people, just start doing something. And if you don't know where to start, surely there's someone in your atmosphere or someone's someone that you can talk to about where to start. To just start moving. And I know, too, people sometimes say things like, well, you know, the gym is just another expense, especially now. I mean, and it is. And I get that people say, well, just stop getting your Starbucks and whatever. And well, not everyone does that sort of thing. I mean, I never really did. I mean, so, I mean, I gave up fast food, but I mean, I was not drinking expensive coffees and things like that. But most people can find that much money in their budget. by giving up something.
And gyms don't have to be expensive. Well, yeah. And even the Y has a financial aid. Oh, yeah. They have financial aid assistance, definitely. But gyms don't have to be expensive. And it's definitely not always about the prettiest facility, the newest facility, the most hardcore looking facility. I mean, if you go to a CrossFit facility, you're $125, $150 a month here, which I think is insane. But that's me. But, you know, just start. Find some place. Get a day pass. And if you walk in and it's not your thing, then, you know, you haven't joined. You don't have a contract or whatever to cancel, membership to cancel.
So get a day pass. Try some places out. But for most people, group fitness is far more satisfying than trying to do things alone. That's true. I can definitely attest to that. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's all I've really got for you. I could keep harassing you, but I think we'll stop there. All right. Thank you. Thank you. All right. See ya. See ya. Have a good one. If exercise isn't fun, you're in the wrong place. I mean, mic drop moment, right? That's what I love about Rhonda.
She doesn't make fitness complicated. She doesn't tell you that you need expensive equipment or a perfect diet. or to look a certain way. With no sugarcoating, she just tells you, show up, wear comfortable clothes, bring water, and find a place where you can have fun with the people that have the same goal. And that thing she said about the gym feeling like church, y 'all, that is exactly how I feel when I take her classes.
Ashley wraps up the series by reflecting on Rhonda's no-sugarcoating approach, the 'gym as church' metaphor, and encouraging listeners who've been sitting on the fence to get a day pass and just start.
And I have often made the joke that it's where I pray the most. Dear God, please don't let me throw up. Dear God, please don't let me pass out. Dear God, help me get through this last set. The gym has become where I go to focus on myself, to find peace, and to be around people who get it. If you've been listening to this whole series, thank you for going on this journey with me. Rhonda's story, it's not just about fitness. It's about choosing your future, taking control of what you can control, and refusing to be a prisoner in your own body. That's powerful stuff. And if you're sitting there thinking, I should probably start moving more, then friend, this is your sign. Find a gym, get a day pass, try some places out. You don't have to have it all figured out, but you do have to start. Onwards and upwards, my friends. Have you worked out today?