Transcript: From Food Coma Family Reunions to Breaking the Generational Curse | Rhonda's 120-Pound Transformation Part 1

What's up, you guys? Famous Ashley Grant here, and welcome to More Movement, Please, a podcast where we talk about getting our bodies moving and finding joy in the journey. Today, I am so excited to bring you the first episode in a special three -part series featuring my incredible fitness instructor, Rhonda Goode. You guys, this woman is fabulous. She's wonderful, she's beautiful, and I'm honored to share her story with you.

In this first episode, we are diving into where it all began for Rhonda, that pivotal moment in 2011 when she walked into a gym at 35 years old and made a decision that would change her entire life and ultimately change the lives of many other people. We're talking about the family health history that scared her into action, the generational patterns of diabetes and high blood pressure that she was determined to break, and how she was able to lose 120 pounds and five dress sizes. by showing up for herself day after day. Now listen, I'm going to give you all a fair warning. Rhonda doesn't sugarcoat anything.

She's going to tell you exactly what it took, including the hard truths about food addiction, family dynamics, and why your Mountain Dew habit might need to go. And yes, we're definitely getting into her very specific salad requirements. Because, apparently, not all lettuce is created equal. So this is part one of three. Buckle up. And let's get into it. I'm just excited that you're here and welcome to the show. So we're just going to kind of dive right in. You posted March 30th, 2018 about your gym anniversary. You had joined on March 31st, 2011. And I'm curious as to what was happening in your life at that time at 35 years old that made you join the gym. I was still at a desk job and I felt horrible. I had come out of working. probably 70 hours a week and was slowing down. And so I had more time available and thought, I really need to do something about this before it gets out of control. Because I

watched my family and my mother and I thought, and of course, a coworker is who talked me into joining the gym. And she lasted about four weeks before she left me. And I looked around and thought, you know, I don't. notice anything physically different yet, but mentally I feel better. I feel better if I'm here. And so I just kept going. And then when I wasn't sleeping in the middle of the night, I was at a 24 hour gym at that point. So at 2 AM, I'd still go back and I'd walk on the treadmill and I just kept going.

And I thought, I'm going to do this. I'm going to change the trajectory of my life. I'm going to do this for nobody but me. whether there's anyone next to me or not, I'm going to do this. So a coworker talked you into it, but then you kind of just fell in love with it. Well, I was really determined not to be my mother. Okay. And I tell everyone that there has to be a driving force and it's usually not going to be necessarily your partner or your best friend. It's usually within you. And there has to be something that says that. Whether you feel like self -esteem and worth is worth it or not, that I'm going to probably be here. And if I'm going to be here, what condition am I going to be in? Yeah. And another thing that you said led you to it was the genetics factor. In multiple posts, you talked about having really bad genes on both sides, being headed in the same direction as your family.

Can you paint a picture for the listeners as to what you were seeing in your family's health that scared you? And how did you break that generational curse? All of my mom's generation, not her parents, but her generation and all of her cousins were diabetic and high blood pressure. They were diagnosed in probably their 30s, 40s with high blood pressure first. Then came diabetes. And diabetes, of course, is very common. And when people are diagnosed with it, it's often looked as if it's not a big deal because you're given plenty of medication to manage it. And, you know, it's rare that people have doctors that talk to them about. how to address it without medication because everything is handed to you in pill form first. And as long as it's managed that way and you're supposed to kind of watch your diet a little, it's good.

And then starts the insulin slide where all of the oral meds aren't going to control it because you also aren't addressing your diet or your weight or anything else. So now you're moving to needles. And then you're moving to needles multiple times per day and then you're increasing your dosage. And I mean, this was early on, you know, for her in her 50s, but watching all of them. And then I, too, was guilty because I would go to family reunions and there were no family reunions on my mother's side until after my grandmother died, which I thought was kind of interesting.

It was almost like they looked and thought, oh, people just die because it was sudden. And I thought we should probably get together. And so you would watch them, all of them, just pile a plate as high as they could pile it. And it was almost like a competition between the men, especially sons and their fathers. And I would watch them just go back and go back. And you would be guilty of it too. Not that you were competing, but it was just the environment you were in. And so the photo that I post, kind of here and there on social media of me is not just a picture of me, like when I was bigger, but is a picture at the reunion with my mother. And we both look like we are just in a food coma because we are, I mean, our eyes are like, we look like we're on drugs. And, you know, and when I look back at that picture, I mean, it was like, wow. I mean, that's That's something.

I mean, I looked like I was drugged out. And I'm sure that I had just consumed all that food. And it was an after photo. And I was huge, you know. And I was not that old, probably, let's see, probably 23 at that point. And so. I mean, I started gaining weight as soon as I got married, which is very typical because of lifestyle changes and lots of females go on birth control and that doesn't help. And I did all of that too. So it wasn't just that I also had a desk job, but just looking at that. And then my father's side, same thing, all high blood pressure, all diabetic.

His mom lost half of a leg to diabetes before her ultimate death from cancer. My father died from cancer, but had diabetes the entire time. And so dying doesn't scare me, as I tell everyone. Living like that does, where you just are not in control of your life because everything is built around all of the medicines you take. You feel like garbage all the time. You're not physically active and you have no energy. And it just. compounds because i don't feel well so i don't feel like moving well i'm not going to move because i don't feel well and i haven't moved in oh 10 years and it's just you know and you just get used to it you get comfortable in it but watching all of them was i'm an only child with no children by choice and so for me i was like there's no one to take care of me yeah and so i really need to do something about this before it's too late because it can get too late yeah Yeah. It is

interesting that you said that you look like you were drugged out because, you know, they've done studies and they've shown that sugar is has the same things, some of the same effects as cocaine. And yeah, that's it is a drug. It is a drug. Yeah. Well, back in 2020, you said that you were down 120 pounds and five dress sizes. And you shared a photo from when you were 25, gaining weight every year with that best job, working 10 hours a day. Walk us through the transformation of what it was like to start making those physical changes, not just physical ones, but who you became as a person through the process. You know, at first when you start, well, I think for most people, I mean, and everyone will tell you that physical activity is the easy thing to start and do. And it is. I mean. You have to start, though. But once you make it a habit, that's easy. Addressing your diet and other things, it's not easy. I mean, most of

us want things that are quick and simple. And I always cooked, but I cooked simple meals and still do. So it wasn't that I was necessarily eating out a lot, but I ate out more. I mean, when I would go to McDonald's at my biggest. And I was with my mother who would encourage me to get more food because, honey, you're going to be hungry if you don't. So I would get two double cheeseburgers and a large fry and a soda and consume all of it. And my mother would sit there and look at me after she'd also eaten an enormous amount of food and say, do we need to go back through the drive -thru and get more?

I mean, it was just constant encouragement of. You know, and I don't know if because my my parents didn't live through the depression. So it wasn't that it was just this mindset that they had. So you kind of have to unlearn that, that, OK, I may still eat some bad things, but I also know that I should probably stop at a certain point instead of just not stopping as I'm eating, you know, because people don't really understand for the most part when they're actually hungry.

Because it's, well, I eat at this time of day every day, or I eat this much every time I eat, or I always, I don't like leftovers or I don't want to throw food out or whatever it is. And so they just keep going back. So you got to have to unlearn that too. And I think that's the first step from normal people that aren't going to get on these fad trains of doing all kinds of crazy things is that when am I actually hungry?

So am I going to slow down and eating? Because that's the other thing, too. People eating while they're driving, people eating while they're working at the desk, people eating all the time because they don't realize it. Or while they're watching TV. Or watching TV or whatever. Everything's mindless, you know. So it's stopping and saying, oh, I'm full. Yeah. I don't need any more, whether that's potato chips or whatever. I mean, I'm full. And then as you change your diet, I mean, I stopped eating fast food completely. I didn't give up soda for. probably the first year, just because it was like, well, I'm definitely not seeing the results I would like to see. And I was a Mountain Dew drinker, which is common in this state anyway. And, you know, I mean, as far as like how many I consume today, I don't know, but probably three, four. I've never been someone who has to have liquid with me all the

time. So it's not as if I just drink, drink, drink, because I didn't do that. I've never done that. I don't do it with water. I just, I don't. And there's a lot of times I don't drink with a meal. Because I don't necessarily feel compelled to drink. I drink when I'm thirsty. I drink when I'm working out. But it was the small steps like that. Because I've never taken any gigantic, crazy steps with food. I mean, I still eat, you know, carbs and chocolate, as I tell you, every day. Now, yesterday, at the end of the day, I was like, did I eat chocolate today? And sometimes I have to think about it. And it's like, oh yes, I did. Okay. Well, you've consumed your amount that you should have today. So you've had to think about it. You must feel like you need some more, but you're not going to do that. But now we all have bad days, whether that's emotional or whatever. And there are some days when I go,

oh, I'm going to eat it again. Yeah. I don't care. I'm going to eat it again. Yeah. You know, or I'm going to go to Cold Stone and get the biggest thing of ice cream in the chocolate dip cone with chocolate, chocolate, chocolate. Because I know I work out every day and I'm going to eat it, you know, but I don't do that weekly even. Yeah. So it's just a it's just a change of I'm still going to have treats. I'm still going to eat what I want, but I'm probably going to manage it better and eat less of it and maybe less often. Yeah. But, you know, so it's all that that you have to. And then as your mindset changes and you physically start seeing changes, of course, you became more confident. I mean, of course you do. Yeah. That's part of it. And then as you become more confident, many times the people around you get really threatened.

And it's very common. And I tell people a lot that, you know, do not be surprised when your family who isn't willing to do the work. Because my mother, up until she died, you're doing too much. You're going to burn your body out. You're working too hard. You're doing too much. You know, and I always used to tell her, well. It's going to wear out. So I can either wear it out working it out or I can wear it out sitting like you're sitting 25 hours a day. Like, I'll take this. It is better. It feels better. So, you know, so but it's just and it's very interesting because most people deal with body dysmorphia when you start and you are always going to see yourself as the big person. And even now in the mirror, when I look at myself, when I see my shadow. Like in the sun. I mean, I'll never forget the first time I really noticed my shadow in the sun. I was like, who is that? Because you just don't believe that you're that size. So

when you go clothes shopping, you go a size or two too big. And some people are just more comfortable in bigger clothes. I mean, you know, I don't necessarily want a tight shirt for a lot of things, but there's also just going in a dressing room and going, oh, I can wear a medium. Or, oh, a small fit. Wow. You know, wow. Because, you know, you never really think that you'll get back to that. But that's also part of the realization, too, is that if you're starting in your 30s or your 40s or your 50s, that you're not going to have the body you had when you were 18 and 19.

It's not going to happen. And that's OK, because you really don't want to have anything back from 18 or 19 because you were usually really young and stupid. You know, so it's just what can how can I be the best version of this age? And what does this age look like for me when you look around you and see other people that are your age and younger and how horribly they live? Yeah, they're all like in pain. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So you've been adamantly consistent about one thing across everything that you've ever posted. No pills, no patches, no shakes, no surgery. And you even mentioned that watching your mother, your outlook became eat less, move more, stay away from pharma. So since you're so opposed to quick fixes, what do you say to people that want the easy way? There's always a side effect.

Always. May not be soon. You may not notice it immediately. But ultimately, there are always going to be downfalls from taking the quick route. It's going to affect you physically in some way. I mean, I have not known one person before Ozempic and all the shots. I've not known one person that had any kind of weight loss surgery that didn't have lifelong side effects from it. Not one. And some are severe where they've got to go back and have more surgeries. Some is just constant stomach problems, constant. You know, but I've never known one. And so, you know, all the quick fixes and all the, I mean, you remember back in the day when it was legal speed, like, I forget, it started with a D, but there was a diet pill that was on the market for years.

And then there was FinFin. But all these things were pulled after they realized that, oh, this is really causing heart attacks in people, you know, because it's legal speed. And so, again, I mean, if we're trying to get healthy. then I mean, if you're, if you're going to just let your heart explode, then just let it explode from being fat and eating whatever you want. I mean, so I, you know, I just, I don't believe in pharma at all. So, you know, so I would, I'm like, stay far, far away from it. And there are always going to be people who say, well, I've had no side effect. They're always, and I'm sure there probably are. Yeah. There's always a small.

percentage of you know and lucky them yeah lucky them yeah i mean i don't know if you know this or not i think i did tell you but i'm not sure 12 years ago i did try the shots and pills i was uh you know doing those Phenermine pills and all the crap. And I lost 80 pounds. And then I gained it right back the second I stopped. Oh, yeah. And I remember getting an EKG and the doctor literally saying to me, your heart seems like it's going to stop. Like, what is happening?

What are you doing? And they were like, you should not be doing what you're doing. Yeah. But yeah, I gained it all back. And it sucked. Yeah. I mean, that's the thing with almost all quick fixes and all fad dieting, which is why I don't prescribe any of it, including keto. I know sugar's bad for you. I mean, I know that I'm not stupid, but I also think it's unrealistic for the majority of the population to say, I'm not going to eat sugar. And I understand too, that it's a withdrawal thing. Yeah. I mean, if you really stuck to it and took it out of your diet for at least a month, I'm sure you'd feel much better. I'm sure I'd feel much better, but it's just not a bridge I'm willing to cross. Not right now. Maybe I will someday, but you know, right now it's not going to happen. Got to have a chocolate. Got to have happy foods. Yeah. Well, let's talk about consistency over motivation. You posted motivation

subsides over time. Discipline is required to keep going, keep showing up and working out even when you don't feel like it. Those who quit lack discipline. That was pretty direct of you. So talk to me about the difference between motivation and discipline. Well, everyone is motivated when you start because you're motivated when anything is new, whether that's a new job, exercise, a new relationship. Everything's fun when it's new. And then everything loses its luster over time. So then you have to make a choice. And all of my folks will tell you when they drag themselves into the gym, they don't feel well.

They always feel better when they leave. They may not feel great. I mean, they may be getting sick. They may have had a bad day. They may be exhausted, but they still feel better when they walk out the door than when they walked in the door, period. And that's just the way of worse. Yeah. Yeah. But I mean, that's the way it works. Well, how do you show up on the days you don't feel like it? Well, that just probably comes from work ethic more than anything else. I mean, I never called into work on my desk job until the very end in the last few years when I really, really, really hated it. And then I started using up some some time because I was like. Oh, boy, because I never took vacations or anything else.

And so I started taking some time off then. But I'm a hard worker and I always have been since I was 17. I mean, I started working full time at 17. So it's just what's in me. And I know that regardless of how I feel, I show up because they show up and they always show up, period. At least a few do. Yeah. Yeah. Get a get a rotating revolving door of people. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, and if you don't show consistency, I mean, most people are looking for consistency, period, in all aspects of their life. And so they know they're going to get it with me. They know that I'm never going to cancel a class or call a sub.

And so I'm there. They don't want to come see me. That's fine. But they always know I'm going to be there. And so. I wouldn't, I don't even consider no matter how bad I feel, no matter how tired I am, I still drive myself in. Yeah. I remember even the day after your mom passed you or you were there and I was shocked that you showed up. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you're switching gears. You say the scale is a liar. You said you always tell people to measure when you start and the scale moves very slowly and will disappoint you every time. So if not the scale, what should people be tracking? Definitely measurements and then how their clothes fit. Obviously, everyone has their favorite pants or their favorite shirts or whatever the case may be. So as you start working out and your body changes, you'll notice that not only do you lose inches, but your body just shifts. Things just shift. That's just how

it goes. And then for a very long time, like every six months, I would notice shifting because it was like. Hmm. I can't point it out, but this shirt fits different than it did, you know? And so it's definitely not. And people talk about non -scale victories all the time. And, and those are definitely something to take note of. I mean, if you can't climb a flight of stairs without losing your breath and then you can clearly that's a victory. But when it comes to you and looking at your body every day, because none of us are happy with what we see. I mean, that's just human nature. um, you know, you have to, you have to really track like measurements and how things fit that you have been wearing for the last two years. You know, every time you grab that pair of pants and then they start getting too loose or the butt sagging or they're falling off. And then it's like, Oh, so something really is happening.

Yeah. Well, it's like, even today I'm wearing a shirt that I haven't been able to wear in 10 years. Yeah. There you go. Um, and I remember one of the posts that you did, there was a picture that you had posted and you said that, uh, When you were filling out your retirement paperwork, you were wearing an extra large and the shirt you were wearing that day was like a small, I think it was. And I was just like, yeah, that's what I want. Yeah. So you've repeatedly said eat chocolate and carbs every day that you do that. But you also said I do not endorse no carbs and no happy foods. But how do you balance what you're eating and enjoy it while you're still seeing results? Like what's your approach to food that doesn't feel like deprivation? Um, I try to manage things. So, um, I mean, I still am. Pasta is my favorite thing in the world.

I could live on pasta. Uh, and so I used to, what I used to do is, um, and I would always justify it is I would get those nor, uh, little bags of pasta. Yeah. 600 calories. Okay. So I would eat that for lunch and be like, this is 600 calories. Everybody eats 600 calories at lunch. I mean, 600 calories. So, you know, I would have that for lunch and then I would fix dinner and fix meat and vegetable and then more rice -a -roni or whatever, you know. And it was like, yeah, well, you know, whatever. So now if I'm going to have pasta for dinner, which I do, not daily, but I mean, I do, you know, as my main course kind of thing. I mean, I'll throw in some meat and veggies on it with it, whatever. But at lunch, I'll have a salad, which I have every single day. And yes, I'd never get tired of my salads. And I know people think, how can you eat the same thing every day? And I think that a lot of people say that it's like,

well, when you're going to fast food restaurants, you don't think about the fact that you're eating the same crap like a burger from here or a burger from there or, you know, or fried chicken. I mean, it's really like all the it's all the same. Like, you know, so I mean, people don't really think about that. So. I stick with my salad every single day. It's the same. I may vary what I put on it slightly. And no protein. I do not.

And I don't eat heavy during the day because I work out again at night. So my heaviest is at night. And I don't eat at, I usually don't eat until 8 o 'clock. And no, I don't go to bed at 9 or 10. So, I mean, I have that conversation with people all the time too. You shouldn't eat that late. And I'm like, well, what time do you eat dinner and what time do you go to bed? Yeah. So to me, it's just like I don't get home until after seven. So I eat at eight, but I also don't go to bed until twelve or one. Yeah. So it's about the same, you know. So I don't really think it's detrimental because to me, it's apples and apples. Like you're up four hours, you're up four hours after you eat dinner, whatever the case is. So I just try to manage like if I'm going to eat pasta, you know, at night, then maybe I'm definitely not going to have a baked potato with the salad. that day maybe I'll have soup a lot of times these days I'm just eating

the salad it's all I'm eating in the middle of the day and having a protein drink like a muscle milk in the morning if I'm really really hungry I'll throw a bagel or something into the mornings but I'm back on the muscle milk train right now so I didn't know this well yeah so I've been doing that most mornings and salad and then I eat dinner at night and then usually I have the chocolate after the salad usually. I always have a salad first and it's like, oh, it's time for chocolate. Yeah. So what's your go -to fixings for the salad? What do you put on it? Has to be a spring mix. I prefer a 50 -50 blend. I don't mind spinach, but I have to have some colorful lettuce. So here I am at the grocery store every week and I vary between two stores that I shop at all the time, but I get the big plastic bin of salad. So here I am looking at it. To see if it's colorful enough for me and if it's also

not wet. Because in the plastic bins, they last all week if it's not wet. So this week I couldn't find any that was sufficient that I liked. So I went with my spring next, but it was too much greens. So then I went and bought some artisan lettuce and some purples to add to it. So that's first. It's got to be colorful. I do not want any iceberg lettuce in my salad. I think that's just a cardinal sin. There's no nutrients in that anyway. So it just tastes like water. Yeah.

And it's usually wet. I like a dry salad. So cherry tomatoes, they got to be cherub or sweet tomatoes. I don't like just any tomato. The ruby reds, private selection, are the best. Cherub tomatoes, cucumbers, sugar snap peas, feta, always feta. throw on some croutons they got to be the fat ones though like puffy fat they can't be those cheap looking square ones that are hard they got to be like the texas roadhouse crunchy spongy ones so i get those and garlic butter throw a few of those on and some ranch but i don't drown my salad and dressing like some people like i put a good amount but not you know how some people are just so anyway So yeah, that's it. That's the go -to every time. Wow, you guys, I don't know about you, but hearing Rhonda talk about looking at that photo of herself and her mother in a food coma at a family reunion, it just hits different, doesn't it? It really does.